Auto Industry Is Not Bailed Out

Top 9 Catastrophes That Will Befall The Planet If The Auto Industry Is Not Bailed Out


This top-secret list of impending calamities was reportedly compiled by the CEOs of the Big Three Auto Makers in an effort to secure a $25 Billion bail-out from Congress.

9. The Earth will spin out of orbit, exacerbating global warming and turning the planet into a giant George Foreman Grill, slow-roasting its populace until dead, albeit delicious and heart-friendly.

8. People will start sincerely responding to Dennis Kucinich’s proposals with, “You know what, that’s a great idea!”

7. Baseball will extend its schedule to 300 games, and increases the games to nineteen innings. But on the positive side, the price of a beer at the ballpark will drop precipitously to $13.

6. Britney Spears stays sober, celibate, and leads a responsible life with her children, bankrupting all existing gossip magazines.

5. The discrepancy between the number of hot dog rolls and hot dogs per package will widen, with manufacturers opting to deliver their products in fractions, further befuddling consumers.

4. Cell phone companies will only offer two ring tones: Susan Estrich birthing a cape buffalo, and Barney Frank learning he has been forbidden from watching gladiator movies.

3. Every Friday and Saturday night will be declared “National Mother-In-Law Day” with government-mandated celebrations.

2. A remake of Waterworld as a musical starring Rosie O’Donnell and Harvey Fierstein.

1. Chuck Norris will wax his chest, tattoo it with a picture of Bea Arthur circa The Golden Girls, and for the rest of his life, only make topless infomercials where he sings the theme from Cats.

Golly gee whiz, Jack! You just scared the blue jeans offa me! Now why would a gentleman like you wanna cause a terrible ripple effect on senior ladies ( like me) and gents (like some of y'all) in the first place????? If y'all are gonna scare us like that then we will have to buy an extra large bottle of Centrum Silver to carry us thru this financial and economic mess!!

Hattie!

P.S. If Britney Spears stays sober and celebate then I'll certainly eat my hat!
For sure!

Us old folks can handle the news

cactus_jack wrote:

Us old folks can handle the news

Something's wrong here, Jack. I can't see the old folks on your post reply to me but when I typed this message and then did a preview - there was a 'geezer' and a 'geezerette' on the page holding hands! I think you have to make a correction on your url - so that everyone can enjoy the 'old folks' in their beach attire!

Hattie!

Hattie thanks!
It should work now.

Nope, not working - still!

Hattie!

Well that's strange because I see it ok! I made it smaller, but I doubt that will help.

Hey! I'm sleeping here!

On TV2, your first post showed the MSN group .
The last one. I see html code.

OK, Jack! I see that the problem is here on my end. I had to go into 'Preferences' and click on to allow html codes to be seen. That's what was keeping your stuff off of my posts here on my end. Confusing! However - I agree with my turtle!

Hattie!

[quote="Hattie"]OK, Jack! I see that the problem is here on my end. I had to go into 'Preferences' and click on to allow html codes to be seen. That's what was keeping your stuff off of my posts here on my end. Confusing! However - I agree with my turtle!

Hattie!

Good find! Now we know the rest of the story.

That was my problem, also. I don't use TV2 much.........Thanks for that Hattie.
Pictures show now.

Joe are you on a puter or tv2? I'll try just just putting in some code with sound and see what happens.

Hey Joe( or Jack), since this Thread has turned into a "test" thread , when I Log-in here, the pages are off my screen to the right. I have to scroll right to see the whole page. This only happens on my PC.
Any ideas?

Dulcimers wrote:

C J I'm on my PC now. I see your water page but no sound which doesn't surprise me in this type forum.

I hear the music loud and clear! Too bad browsers very so much.

Tiz wrote:

Hey Joe( or Jack), since this Thread has turned into a "test" thread , when I Log-in here, the pages are off my screen to the right. I have to scroll right to see the whole page. This only happens on my PC.
Any ideas?

I'm getting the same thing on my mac. I have no idea what to do to correct it!

Me either. It's in this forum. I've went both ways configuring the page width but it isn't taking. Maybe Suzy knows.